Aw, Professor

 In honor of misplaced adoration. Hundredaires are falling all over themselves to defend and adore billionaires in my country, particularly a famously fake billionaire who convinced him he was keeping his finances secret in order to cheat on his taxes. He was, as most of us understood all along, concealing the fact that he had squandered his inheritance and would be relying on his fanbase to buy a lot of hats and flags to help him make bail.

  In honor of the Testing Industrial Complex

 In honor of architecture that lacks resilience

In honor of resumption

 In honor of digital progress.

 In honor of small universities with more vice presidents than a person has fingers.

 In honor of people -- like me -- who could not decide what to be when they grow up.